Tag Archives: internet dating

My Virtual Boyfriend – Part 2

Unknown-1The plans went back and forth for weeks with him changing his mind and not being able to commit to a meeting location or city. Do we meet up by him? A few hours south, down by where I was staying? Or someplace neutral like Miami where we could go on a fun date of sorts. He seemed flustered and unable to make a decision and I was trying to set him at ease, so we decided to wait until I arrived.

By the time I got to Florida and we were in the process of coordinating when he could leave his mom unattended, we had arranged to meet up in the afternoon for lunch and he made a hotel reservation nearby for two nights. We had  it all planned out. We would meet for lunch, he then had a job interview or meeting or something he would attend, and then we would meet up again for dinner. Regardless of how it went I would NOT be staying at the hotel and he wanted to have a traditional first date, regardless of our untraditional situation. Next day he would pick me up, we’d spend the day together and if things meshed, maybe I’d stay at the hotel on night two. No pressure, no expectations….in theory anyhow.

Somehow this turned into us meeting at Starbucks for a coffee and from the get-go I knew he was nervous. I wasn’t attracted to him per se, but since we had gotten to know one another on a much deeper level, I didn’t pass judgement and treated it like we were old friends, open to whatever may or may not happen. We had a nice lunch and gave me a gift bag with two cards. One was a sweet friendship card about how often he thinks about me and the other a thoughtful birthday card. At least one of them mentioned the phrase girlfriend inside. When he handed me the bag he said “Happy Belated Birthday” and I was touched by his thoughtfulness.

I opened it up and started pulling out the wads of tissue paper stuffed inside. I reached in to find a chocolate Toblerone candy bar. One of my favorites that I had mentioned in a previous conversation. Oh I wonder if he is giving me all of my favorite things or something sweet like that! I now excitedly dipped back in for what other surprises awaited me, grabbing more and more tissue each time. “Oh, that’s it. There’s nothing else in there,” he replied in a matter of fact fashion.” “Oh thank you that was very sweet” I said on the outside while my inner voice just wondered, did you just give me a big gift bag filled with tissue….and a candy bar for my birthday? Way to build up expectations dude!

Lunch was pleasant and we sat for a few hours before he needed to head off for his meeting. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to kiss him or how I felt, but I figured things would be more casual over dinner after a cocktail or two and we would both let our guard down. We hugged goodbye and said we’d talk in a few hours about the evening schedule.

About two hours passed and he phoned me from his cell, immediately sounding fidgety and uneasy. “Uhhhh listen….I need to be honest with you….I had a great time, but I just didn’t feel butterflies. I didn’t want there to be any pressure so I uhhhh…..gave up the hotel…..and I’m going home instead.”

So you mean to tell me you are in the car now driving home and didn’t even feel comfortable enough to stay and hang out or have dinner?

“Uhhhh…..I just felt like I was having lunch with my best friend and not someone I wanted to fuck.”

Let me tell you, when someone says that to you, you are no longer obligated to use any filter whatsoever so I told him exactly what I was thinking as well. That I didn’t know how I felt or if he was my type but after investing 3+ months of intense conversation EVERY SINGLE DAY, I thought it was worth t least having dinner before coming to any conclusions. Thing is….I was a little relieved (albeit annoyed and slightly insulted) and he actually thought I was saying all that to cut him slack and make him feel better. Unfucking real, men and their egos.

So here’s where the bizarre quota goes up again, let me give you the basic stats at this point.

1. He gave me cards and referred to me repeatedly as his girlfriend

2. We never so much as even kissed or had any sexual relationship

3. After “courting” for 3 months when we were finally going to spend some time together, he bolted after lunch and went home…to his mom

4. He told me he did NOT in fact want to fuck me (but to not take it personally of course or think it had any impact on my  overall fuckability)

5. He followed up by continuing to call me numerous times a day, texting etc…..like none of the above had happened

6. He became hostile and jealous at the mere mention of other men, me going out with any male friends or the mere mention of any of my exes

7. He mentioned how disappointed he was that I never referred to him as baby or sweetie (post “fuck” comment mind you)

Ugh, you know, this is merely scratching the surface of the shenanigans that went on with him for 4 months including when I returned to NY. Call it head games, nonsense, man-child jealous hijinks, I really want no part of it.

Here’s the crazy part, I wound up deciding to move back to Florida and we WOULD have been able to carry on a relationship. About 3 weeks before I was set to move he suddenly stopped all communication. Cold in his tracks, never to be heard from again.

I suppose the thought of a real girlfriend isn’t nearly as easy or comfortable as having a virtual one.

My Virtual Boyfriend – Part 1

Sad to admit this was the last encounter I had dating, and to be honest, it sorta sucked the wind out of me and left me with no idea how to relay the story.

A guy online contacted me and when I reviewed his profile I thought, “oh this is good. But…” It was well written, said all the things I wanted to hear and more importantly, had no red flags or deal breakers. but he wasn’t my type. I just didn’t know if I could picture myself with him. There wasn’t anything wrong with him, his features were nice….but I wasn’t drawn to him or picking up a vibe that we’d connect. I decided I would go outside my comfort zone and at least see if he had any personality, anything about him that intrigued me. Nothing ventured, nothing gained right?

The next few days were exciting and fun, filled with emails, calls and texts from him…as we got to know one another and some of the crazy coincidences we had in common. We grew up about 30 miles from one another. We went to the same college and lived in the same dorm (he being older than me, we never overlapped), we both studied abroad our junior year, in the same European city. Both have moved around and had careers combined of freelance and full-time positions and lived in several cities. Both nomadic, sarcastic, sharp but emotional and sensitive. And then I found out he lived in my same building in New York City. Ten years prior. That’s just crazy, of all the places in New York he lived in my exact building? Beyond coincidence, this was kismet.

So what’s the catch? Yeah, of course there’s one…. He doesn’t live in New York currently. He’s down south and thinking about possibly returning, but meanwhile has family matters to attend to. “Why did you list you lived in NY?” “Oh, that’s the type of woman I want to meet. And who knows, maybe I’ll return.” After extensive conversations of me explaining that by no means was I looking for a long distance relationship or a pen pal he seemed to agree he wasn’t either. How he’s ready to settle in and settle down and wants to share his life with a great woman.

The talks were then followed up by others just as intimate, personal, compelling and revealing. Every day, hours a day for nearly three weeks. This went on for weeks, the daily calls, emails and texts. And then things got REALLY complicated. There is that new stage a/k/a honeymoon phase when you first meet someone and they want to make the best possible impression so they tell you only the good stuff….and of course that’s all you hear anyhow even if there are some red flags peppered into passing conversation. So I’m thinking a month passed before I got the truth out of him. And it was a doozey. Even for me.

He had lived in NY amongst a few other cities, but circumstances now had him living with his 85-year-old mother –in Florida. So not only was he not living in NYC, the likelihood of him coming back to NY was slim. By this time we had spent countless hours speaking, confiding and sharing with one another – clearly on a friendship level….well, at least for me. You see he thought he was my boyfriend. He even referred to me as his girlfriend on the phone on more than one occasion. You mean your virtual girlfriend??

So where does this get even stranger?…..He had no money (pretty much a given with the men I meet) and couldn’t afford to “fly up and take me out the way I deserved.” So instead, he just never came at all. I think he actually enjoyed the no strings dynamic of a phone girl friend while I had bigger fish to fry as my life was coming apart at the seems and I prepared myself for another potential upheaval and career change. What did I get out of it you ask? A confidant and friend who lent an ear and who I reciprocated tenfold. A friend….with sexual overtones….but no actual sex. Phone sex is fun for about ten minutes and then I put the kaibosh on that shit.

This continued for about 3 months with his calls only amping in frequency and intensity. Then I planned a trip down to Florida for something else and decided we should meet up.

We did… 

The Mysterious Case of the Two Widowers

Not long ago I discovered a profile online that, quite frankly, seemed too good to be true. Alas, the optimistic romantic in me had no reason to not believe what he said. Late 40’s, handsome widower, professional, no kids etc etc. He wrote about his quest to find love again, how his wife died x number of years ago and he wants to spoil a woman with love, tenderness and affection. Treat her right and show her how gentlemen still exist and chivalry is far from dead. Nothing suspicious about the profile, it was just a bit gushy and over the top for my taste. I chalked it up to the guy being so heartbroken about losing his wife and being new to the dating game.

He writes me and immediately tells me we should text – better than emailing on Match. When he gives me his number it’s from the LA area. Hmmm….”do you live in NY or Cali?” I ask. He gave some long-winded explanation that boiled down to him just moving from LA to NY two weeks ago. Here are some outtakes of the text conversations. They progressively got stranger and his English got progressively worse – neither are good signs.

Him: “I don’t know much around. but it’s quite an interesting place…hope I can find the right woman.

You are quite interesting….have you found a match that suits you online?

You have such a kind and beautiful heart…it will be a dream come true

I’m not a cynical New Yorker, I will use that to my advantage but also take it through your heart and mind….what do you think?

You don’t have to underestimate the power of love…it’s beyond our definition….maybe if we give it a shot 

Are you scared of falling in love? I will look at my time schedule then think of a plan out….how was your day?

Believe me it’s worth it all but I won’t disappoint you…you can take a risk 

Don’t you think love itself is about risk?”

I’ve omitted my part of the conversation because, does it really matter?  WTF kinds of responses are these? Who speaks like this? And his remarks were not even related to what I was talking about. Surely the sign of someone whose native language is other than English. These responses were also over the course of several days that never led to him actually asking me out. I lost interest and became creeped out with the last comment about love and risk taking.

That was that and I moved on. No more than a day or two later I received another email from another late 40’s, professional, handsome widower also pouring his heart out. Only he emailed me this bizarre form letter and also gave me an email saying we should communicate off of match.com.

Good Morning Pretty,

How are you doing? I can’t help but say you are beautiful. I have wondered for years without a possible cure to my heart aches and emotional pains, until stumbled on your enchanting and very exquisite profile, I dream of love, love that inspires, love that makes you feel passion and desire, love that makes you feel complete. I have so much love, tenderness, warmth inside of me and I want to give this to some one special like you. I have viewed your profile and you seem like someone who has a lot of the same interests as I do. I have a daughter called Anna she is very close to me. and it has been very hard to find someone that sparks my interest. I feel that life is too short to be lonely and I would love to find someone caring and respectful to spend some time with. I just join this site to find someone who I will love and care for. I also don’t like drama or complications. I desire to find a woman who is respectful, sincere above all most be honest and it would be nice to find a friend to laugh with, dine with and someone who shares the same interests as I do. I’m easy to get along with, pleasant personality and I consider myself a good man.

I am currently online now and I will really want us to talk. You can reply me to my personal email address mp.robertxxx@xx.xom, or add me to your personal email address so we can get to know each other better. your mail will put a smile on my face……

You can text me ..(315) xxx-xxxx

 Rob…

Hmmm….two widowers, both with the same stats, very handsome, both want to chat offline, both with out of area phone numbers, both over the top ridiculous chit-chat about love with a complete stranger. I ignored it.

The next day both profiles were taken down off match. Was this a precursor to some Liberian Prince financial scam? A serial killer in the midst? A bored guy in prison looking to fill his hour of free Internet allotted for the week? Or just some turd looking to pray on lonely, naïve women by telling them what they think we want to hear?

I have no ending to the story, no idea what their motives were but surely something wasn’t kosher. For anyone that wonders why internet dating is so challenging (or scary or exhausting) this is just one example. Reason enough to convince myself...if it seems to good to be true….

It’s likely a con artist or sociopath in the making.

An Open Letter to My Future Husband

Dear Future Husband,

As we were in the early stages of getting to know one another, I thought it was only fair to point out a few things about myself that perhaps, may not be so obvious. I mean, how could you know all the angst and frustration I’ve been through in my dating life? How could you know I’m prone to anxiety and that I’m extremely impatient? – Meaning I am more of what you would call “impulsive” I suppose. How could you know that as much as I trust no man that I date (until he proves that I can, in fact trust him), I still easily fall for someone and can get hurt more easily than I’d like. How could you know that I actually take you for your word and want to believe you when you say you are speaking the truth. Thing is, I don’t really think I’m unique in any of these aspects, I kind of think most women think and believe these things…but hey…how could you know?

To help us both out, I thought it might be useful to exemplify the worst-case scenario of what not to do. What not to say and how not to act, in order to avoid these types of situations for both of our betterment.

 

1. Please do not set a date for a week away after having our initial conversation. I realize, of course, sometimes this is unavoidable, but it’s usually best to move quickly while the iron is hot so to speak. If we do have a week lag before meeting please skip to number 2.

2. Please do not call me twice a day every day and fill that in with multiple texts and emails, specifically when you wake and go to sleep. It’s only going to make me believe you are constantly thinking about me, excited to meet me and that we have an unexplainable connection before ever meeting face to face. All this will do is paint a picture in my mind that you are exactly what I’m looking for, thoughtful, attentive, interested and into me.

This also applies to speaking of the future in any sense. Any plans for the two of us, how we will be doing laundry together, taking weekend trips etc. Don’t even allude to these things. It’s really just putting the horse before the cart. If I could count all the boats, trips and summer homes I’ve been “invited to” prior to a first date I would have been living it up like Beyonce’.

3. On our date, please don’t continue to talk of future plans and then be stroking my hands before dessert comes. Don’t lean in and kiss me at the table repeatedly and act lovingly when we’ve known one another for 3 hours.

4. Please don’t act so interested in my life and my family and wanting to tell me the minutiae of yours. Again, it’s only going to give me the impression that you care and really want to know.

5. Please don’t comment about how fantastic the date is and then proceed to compliment me while you’re crafting the perfectly ideal romantic evening. It really sets the bar quite high that you’re enjoying yourself and having a great time.

6. Please do make mention of another date or plans for another date before the evening is over. It makes me feel you are genuinely interested and sets my mind at ease as to whether I’ll ever see you again. Saying “I’ll call you tomorrow” only works if I believe it’s true.

7. When you do call the next day and end the call, don’t say, “Let’s get together next week. But I’m really busy so I don’t know when. So maybe Wednesday. I don’t know.”

When Wednesday comes and goes and I don’t hear from you I’m already starting to rage that you are inconsiderate and rude, and likely not interested.

8. When you do text me and it’s mundane conversation with no mention of a date, I’m going to wonder WTF and why are you bothering. I’ll assume I’m on your back burner with something or someone of higher importance cooking. I’m also going to wonder how you had so much time last week in your busy schedule to call me twice a day when now you’re barely texting once.

9. So here’s the thing…..I’m going to call you out at some point. I’m going to give you an opportunity to bow out gracefully and be on your merry way. If you don’t have the balls to say, “I don’t think we’re a match” (despite said words and behavior) I’m going to open the door and gently assist you. You see, here’s how we’re different….when I go on a date and have a great time….I actually would like to see you again. And not in a week or two from now. BUT, if it’s unavoidable, I’m going to express my interest and keep the momentum going….to show I am thoughtful and interested in you! That’s how normal people date.

10. Please, when I give you the opportunity to say See Ya…please take it if you have no intention of calling me or seeing me again. What does it accomplish for you to say “we’ll make a date soon!” Why bother? Why keep me lingering? It’s really quite cruel and unfair actually. Unless of course you’re a 15-year-old boy, then of course it’s perfectly par for the course. If I didn’t like you, or had some balls of my own, I would reply with “don’t bother!” What self-respecting woman is going to sit and let a man follow-up for a second date weeks after the first when you were probably not busy with work so much, but more like testing out another relationship you were unsure of.

11. Please I beg you, don’t follow up the “soon” conversation by sending me a text saying “you’ll call me tonight to talk about what’s going on…things haven’t been easy for you lately, you have so much going on…bla bla bla…..”…………..and then NEVER CALL…..again….ever.

 

I’d be lying if I didn’t say this one stung. Although nothing really shocks or surprises me, it still angered, then upset then disappointed me…

Girl gets up off bike, bandages herself up, picks up the bike, and gets back on it to take another ride.

 

How to Spot a Douchebag

This one is actually not a challenge at all . As much as I respect someone who fully represents who they are, I wonder if this person has gone back and read what he wrote as his list of requirements….and realizes what a jackass he truly is.

I have been accused of being shallow but I assure you I am not. I know what I want and I don’t want to waste both our time if we are not a good fit. I respect the wishes of women on here by not emailing them if I am outside of their requirements (I know I am not 6ft tall so I will never email you if thats what you specify). Please respect mine:

1. You consider yourself a step above the rest with respect to taste in clothes, food and furniture even if you can’t afford what you like.

2. You are very into fashion and that’s international fashion, not New England fashion.

3. You have a collection of heels.

4. You do not wear sneakers with jeans and do not date the sneakers and Levi 501 type of guy. Sneakers are meant for the gym and 501 Levi’s are meant to be in the museum!

5. You are very comfortable wearing tight fitting skirts above the knee.

6. You believe showing a bit if cleavage is sexy. (I’m beginning to think that this may be banned in New England).

7. You know who Thierry Mugler is.

8. You have or want to travel.

9. You have no sports team clothing you wear casually.

10. Body type is not important but a sexy walk with attitude is. I love the type who believe they are sexy!

11. Your hair styles are modern and fashionable and you probably have a gay and very cool and trendy hair stylist.

12. You would not have an issue with eating seaweed chocolates.

A Date With My Future Husband

Thought I’d mix things up for once with an optimistic, encouraging and positive spin on internet dating. There’s a shocker for ya!

Even better, I’m not going to divulge anything personal about him in the hopes that I will have nothing to say. In the world of date blogging….no news is good news. After going back and forth for nearly a month with one particular guy who was apparently “out-of-town” and then vanished, things started to look bleak. Not only did he waste my time of writing for a month, but kept telling me how awesome I was and what a great date we would be going on – dinner, wine,etc etc. Talk to the hand buddy – follow-up is key and obviously I was in back burner mode while you were courting someone else. Which is fine. Just don’t keep stringing me along. Next….

Did  another quick trial stint on match.com and here’s where the surprise comes in……found a guy that is…..everything I am looking for. On paper anyhow! That is of course, the tricky part since we all know it means nothing until you meet. All I can say is we have spoken several times, going out in a few days and I’m very excited and optimistic (as much as a dating cynic can be anyhow). No red flags, no noticeable baggage or skeletons and just a nice……normal guy.

Amazing how after all this drama I would be so excited to meet someone deemed “normal”….not boring….not ordinary….but stable, responsible, kind, generous, intelligent, motivated, funny and emotionally and legally available. Wow, can you imagine?!

Who knows what my feedback will be after in the in-person encounter but for the next few days at least, I can refer to him as my future husband for my own benefit and amusement. Everyone wish me luck!

HOT off the press

I would have included this in my previous post, however, it just came in. From a very attractive, very young (early-mid 20’s) man. So it’s pretty clear, if I’d like to have sex  with a different young man every night….it’s pretty much up for the taking. I’m sure you men are jealous and thinking “why the hell not!” Ughhh….

Am I  the only normal person online looking for a relationship?….Don’t answer that. Just read…

Hi there. I am looking for something very different and thought you might be interested. I am looking to put on a show for a woman who is nice looking and classy. Basically I will be nude and get off in front of you with in a kinky way. You can sit back, relax, and enjoy. More and less can happen depending on the situation. I am a very nice and respectful guy and do not do this often at all. I am actually leaving work soon and wont be online at all but would love to talk. Maybe email me if you would like to?

I can also explain to you why I decided to message you specifically.

 

Dutch Boy

I’m always fascinated by the ever popular dating topic of who pays and when.

I’ve never really thought of it as being a big deal until I started hearing repeated stories from male friends about women calling it quits early on due to the way a man handles or deflects the bill when presented. It’s amazing how a perfectly wonderful evening can come to a screeching halt when the check comes and no one reaches for it, or the woman reaches….and the man says “cool, thanks!”

Just last week I had lunch with a male friend of mine and when I enquired about his love life he told me about a woman he had been on a few dates with.

“Everything was going great, we went out a few times, great girl, very attractive, lots in common and then…nothing. I texted her about a follow up date and she ignored me. I couldn’t possiby understand what went wrong and how she could have lost interest so quickly. Turns out, she admitted when she took out her credit card to pay for the chinese food and I let her pay she was completely annoyed and offended and said I wasn’t the kind of man she was looking for. Meanwhile, I just didn’t want to offend her by insisting on paying. I know women will get insulted if you don’t let them pay when they offer.”

Okay, first off….women will NOT get insulted if you do not let them pay! They will however hold it against you if you do them pay. Let’s just call a spade a spade here. Women offer to pay but as modern or progressive as they may be, they actually have no intention or desire to pick up the bill. Not in the early stages of dating which is say, dates 1-4 or 5. He had no clue. Or chose not to.

What I’ve learned is this. Do not offer to pay unless you are fully prepared and willing to. You can’t offer and then hold it against him. You can, however, make a decision as to whether you’d like to continue seeing them based on such behavior.

Which brings me to my date with Dutch Boy.

So many things that went sour in my brain and indicated his utter cheapness but it capped off with me asking him if he was hungry since it was 7 pm and he says “Not really, I don’t really eat much. Food isn’t important and I don’t have much of an appetite.” First date, I let the food component slide, but this was date two…it’s 7 pm, I’d like to eat. I was hungry so we agreed on the local place I take many of my dates to. We coincidentally sat in the same table where Hearts and Flowers Guy and I sat.

We each ordered a beer and some hummus sampler (I ate most of which). Conversation was fine and perfectly enjoyable but I was starting to feel the romantic connection slipping away. The bill came as I was getting up to go to the bathroom. When I returned, the bill was STILL sitting there with no form of payment on it. I knew exactly what that meant as it was clearly intentional. He THEN reached for his wallet and so I merely glanced at the check when he uttered “$20 from each of us should be good.”

 
Actually my friend……that would be the OPPOSITE of good, but I’m glad you are showing who you are and your preferred and chosen lifestyle to me now because I just lost my lady-wood in a big way. I was so turned off it amazes me how dumb a guy can be for $20. I mean, let’s just say there was a chance of him getting laid…..well, there was NONE after that outburst. Schmuck. Nothing went wrong on the date, it wasn’t malicious, just his choice. As a matter of fact, I’m pretty sure he was into me.
It was raining and early and I was bored and awake, so we came back to my apt to watch tv and hang out and perhaps make out a little. I’ve never been so cognizant and lucid of what was and wasn’t going to happen. Nice guy, means well, totally clueless as to how offensive and stupid that little move of his was. Normally in a situation like that since he doesn’t live in the city, I’d likely let him sleep over even if we weren’t going to have sex. But Dutch Boy was getting none of my hospitality at this point. Was able to seal the deal when he opened up and told me he keeps women’s underwear as souvenirs. You mean like the way serial killers do?
 
I think you’d better go grab that bus back to Jersey.

The Date Who Came to Dinner…and Wouldn’t Go the Fuck Home

Welcome back dear long time readers and new followers!

It’s been a while since I’ve posted for numeros reasons. Personal shit that has taken precedence over this and then couple it with the fact I haven’t been on a date in a few months. And it was a doozy…

I’m somewhat inspired to finally write again as the date was too good not to share (and when I say good I of course mean awful) and I’m going on a new date tonight with someone I’m looking forward to. He seems cute, funny, nice and normal….but then again most of them do before you meet them. Unfortunately, there is a wicked heat wave and I’m exhausted with no motivation to even think about prepping for what sloppy mess is going to be presented to this guy. Good think I keep Red Bull on hand in the fridge.

But the good stuff….

So the last date/s I had were a few months ago with a real blue ribbon prize winner. If I wasn’t delirious from the heat I would have written this in story form but I figured a bulleted listing of some red flags will suffice for now. We went out a few times, the last of which I made him dinner at my place on a Saturday evening…only to have him squat at my apartment until Sunday at 6pm. Oh and when I say squat I mean asleep…in my bed…and refusing to get up and or leave. While I did this and that around him in the other room.

You’re probably thinking, “Are you stupid, why didn’t you wake his ass up and kick him out?!” At the time I don’t think I realized how rude I would find it not to mention how I would grow to despise him by nightfall. It all crystallized however, when he said to me (upon waking up) “You know, if we start dating – I’ll sleep here during the week and you’ll come out to my place on weekends. I’ll sleep all day while you go to work.”

Ladies……THIS is what’s out there, I kid you not! For those wondering, he “works for himself” and yes it’s in quotes for a reason.

I like to think of the things that we store in the back of our brains to use at a later time as pink flags.Not quite deal-breakers on their own, but when combined or viewed in hindsight – shine like beacons in the night to wake you up from your sex coma and make you realize what a loser you have on your hands.

Pink flag statements:

- Why would I ask about your family? I don’t care about your family, I’m not dating them

- I hate my dad, I’ve thought about killing him for the money

- It tuns me on to see how many people have visited my profile, let’s go online to my page and look. Do you want to see who is writing me and sending me dirty pictures?

- If we date, I would come over and sleep during the day while you work  (good enough to mention twice)

- I don’t ever watch the news…or read the newspaper it doesn’t impact me

Oh for those playing the home game…..I just realized THIS is Mr. Hearts and Flowers. Figures!

It’s Not me….It’s You

 

 

 

More stories coming soon….hold your horses will ya
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